The Secret Life of Walter Mitty
by James Thurber
WE'RE going through!" The Commander's voice was
like thin ice breaking. He wore his full-dress uniform, with the heavily
braided white cap pulled down rakishly over one cold gray eye. "We can't
make it, sir. It's spoiling for a hurricane, if you ask me." "I'm not asking
you, Lieutenant Berg," said the Commander. "Throw on the power lights! Rev
her up to 8500! We're going through!" The pounding of the cylinders
increased: ta-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa. The Commander stared
at the ice forming on the pilot window. He walked over and twisted a row of
complicated dials. "Switch on No. 8 auxiliary!" he shouted. "Switch on No. 8
auxiliary!" repeated Lieutenant Berg. "Full strength in No. 3 turret!"
shouted the Commander. "Full strength in No. 3 turret!" The crew, bending to
their various tasks in the huge, hurtling eight-engined Navy hydroplane,
looked at each other and grinned. "The Old Man'll get us through," they said
to one another. "The Old Man ain't afraid of hell!" . . .
"Not so fast! You're driving too fast!" said Mrs. Mitty. "What are you
driving so fast for?"
"Hmm?" said Walter Mitty. He looked at his wife, in the seat beside him,
with shocked astonishment. She seemed grossly unfamiliar, like a strange
woman who had yelled at him in a crowd. "You were up to fifty-five," she
said. "You know I don't like to go more than forty. You were up to
fifty-five." Walter Mitty drove on toward Waterbury in silence, the roaring
of the SN202 through the worst storm in twenty years of Navy flying fading
in the remote, intimate airways of his mind. "You're tensed up again," said
Mrs. Mitty. "It's one of your days. I wish you'd let Dr. Renshaw look you
over."
Walter Mitty stopped the car in front of the building where his wife went to
have her hair done. "Remember to get those overshoes while I'm having my
hair done," she said. "I don't need overshoes," said Mitty. She put her
mirror back into her bag. "We've been all through that," she said, getting
out of the car. "You're not a young man any longer." He raced the engine a
little. "Why don't you wear your gloves? Have you lost your gloves?" Walter
Mitty reached in a pocket and brought out the gloves. He put them on, but
after she had turned and gone into the building and he had driven on to a
red light, he took them off again. "Pick it up, brother!" snapped a cop as
the light changed, and Mitty hastily pulled on his gloves and lurched ahead.
He drove around the streets aimlessly for a time, and then he drove past the
hospital on his way to the parking lot.
. . . "It's the millionaire banker, Wellington McMillan," said the pretty
nurse. "Yes?" said Walter Mitty, removing his gloves slowly. "Who has the
case?" "Dr. Renshaw and Dr. Benbow, but there are two specialists here, Dr.
Remington from New York and Dr. Pritchard-Mitford from London. He flew
over." A door opened down a long, cool corridor and Dr. Renshaw came out. He
looked distraught and haggard. "Hello, Mitty," he said. `'We're having the
devil's own time with McMillan, the millionaire banker and close personal
friend of Roosevelt. Obstreosis of the ductal tract. Tertiary. Wish you'd
take a look at him." "Glad to," said Mitty.
In the operating room there were whispered introductions: "Dr. Remington,
Dr. Mitty. Dr. Pritchard-Mitford, Dr. Mitty." "I've read your book on
streptothricosis," said Pritchard-Mitford, shaking hands. "A brilliant
performance, sir." "Thank you," said Walter Mitty. "Didn't know you were in
the States, Mitty," grumbled Remington. "Coals to Newcastle, bringing
Mitford and me up here for a tertiary." "You are very kind," said Mitty. A
huge, complicated machine, connected to the operating table, with many tubes
and wires, began at this moment to go pocketa-pocketa-pocketa. "The new
anesthetizer is giving away!" shouted an intern. "There is no one in the
East who knows how to fix it!" "Quiet, man!" said Mitty, in a low, cool
voice. He sprang to the machine, which was now going
pocketa-pocketa-queep-pocketa-queep . He began fingering delicately a row of
glistening dials. "Give me a fountain pen!" he snapped. Someone handed him a
fountain pen. He pulled a faulty piston out of the machine and inserted the
pen in its place. "That will hold for ten minutes," he said. "Get on with
the operation. A nurse hurried over and whispered to Renshaw, and Mitty saw
the man turn pale. "Coreopsis has set in," said Renshaw nervously. "If you
would take over, Mitty?" Mitty looked at him and at the craven figure of
Benbow, who drank, and at the grave, uncertain faces of the two great
specialists. "If you wish," he said. They slipped a white gown on him, he
adjusted a mask and drew on thin gloves; nurses handed him shining . . .
"Back it up, Mac!! Look out for that Buick!" Walter Mitty jammed on the
brakes. "Wrong lane, Mac," said the parking-lot attendant, looking at Mitty
closely. "Gee. Yeh," muttered Mitty. He began cautiously to back out of the
lane marked "Exit Only." "Leave her sit there," said the attendant. "I'll
put her away." Mitty got out of the car. "Hey, better leave the key." "Oh,"
said Mitty, handing the man the ignition key. The attendant vaulted into the
car, backed it up with insolent skill, and put it where it belonged.
They're so damn cocky, thought Walter Mitty, walking along Main Street; they
think they know everything. Once he had tried to take his chains off,
outside New Milford, and he had got them wound around the axles. A man had
had to come out in a wrecking car and unwind them, a young, grinning
garageman. Since then Mrs. Mitty always made him drive to a garage to have
the chains taken off. The next time, he thought, I'll wear my right arm in a
sling; they won't grin at me then. I'll have my right arm in a sling and
they'll see I couldn't possibly take the chains off myself. He kicked at the
slush on the sidewalk. "Overshoes," he said to himself, and he began looking
for a shoe store.
When he came out into the street again, with the overshoes in a box under
his arm, Walter Mitty began to wonder what the other thing was his wife had
told him to get. She had told him, twice before they set out from their
house for Waterbury. In a way he hated these weekly trips to town--he was
always getting something wrong. Kleenex, he thought, Squibb's, razor blades?
No. Tooth paste, toothbrush, bicarbonate, Carborundum, initiative and
referendum? He gave it up. But she would remember it. "Where's the
what's-its- name?" she would ask. "Don't tell me you forgot the
what's-its-name." A newsboy went by shouting something about the Waterbury
trial.
. . . "Perhaps this will refresh your memory." The District Attorney
suddenly thrust a heavy automatic at the quiet figure on the witness stand.
"Have you ever seen this before?'' Walter Mitty took the gun and examined it
expertly. "This is my Webley-Vickers 50.80," ho said calmly. An excited buzz
ran around the courtroom. The Judge rapped for order. "You are a crack shot
with any sort of firearms, I believe?" said the District Attorney,
insinuatingly. "Objection!" shouted Mitty's attorney. "We have shown that
the defendant could not have fired the shot. We have shown that he wore his
right arm in a sling on the night of the fourteenth of July." Walter Mitty
raised his hand briefly and the bickering attorneys were stilled. "With any
known make of gun," he said evenly, "I could have killed Gregory Fitzhurst
at three hundred feet with my left hand." Pandemonium broke loose in the
courtroom. A woman's scream rose above the bedlam and suddenly a lovely,
dark-haired girl was in Walter Mitty's arms. The District Attorney struck at
her savagely. Without rising from his chair, Mitty let the man have it on
the point of the chin. "You miserable cur!" . . .
"Puppy biscuit," said Walter Mitty. He stopped walking and the buildings of
Waterbury rose up out of the misty courtroom and surrounded him again. A
woman who was passing laughed. "He said 'Puppy biscuit,'" she said to her
companion. "That man said 'Puppy biscuit' to himself." Walter Mitty hurried
on. He went into an A. & P., not the first one he came to but a smaller one
farther up the street. "I want some biscuit for small, young dogs," he said
to the clerk. "Any special brand, sir?" The greatest pistol shot in the
world thought a moment. "It says 'Puppies Bark for It' on the box," said
Walter Mitty.
His wife would be through at the hairdresser's in fifteen minutes' Mitty saw
in looking at his watch, unless they had trouble drying it; sometimes they
had trouble drying it. She didn't like to get to the hotel first, she would
want him to be there waiting for her as usual. He found a big leather chair
in the lobby, facing a window, and he put the overshoes and the puppy
biscuit on the floor beside it. He picked up an old copy of Liberty and sank
down into the chair. "Can Germany Conquer the World Through the Air?" Walter
Mitty looked at the pictures of bombing planes and of ruined streets.
. . . "The cannonading has got the wind up in young Raleigh, sir," said the
sergeant. Captain Mitty looked up at him through tousled hair. "Get him to
bed," he said wearily, "with the others. I'll fly alone." "But you can't,
sir," said the sergeant anxiously. "It takes two men to handle that bomber
and the Archies are pounding hell out of the air. Von Richtman's circus is
between here and Saulier." "Somebody's got to get that ammunition dump,"
said Mitty. "I'm going over. Spot of brandy?" He poured a drink for the
sergeant and one for himself. War thundered and whined around the dugout and
battered at the door. There was a rending of wood and splinters flew through
the room. "A bit of a near thing," said Captain Mitty carelessly. 'The box
barrage is closing in," said the sergeant. "We only live once, Sergeant,"
said Mitty, with his faint, fleeting smile. "Or do we?" He poured another
brandy and tossed it off. "I never see a man could hold his brandy like you,
sir," said the sergeant. "Begging your pardon, sir." Captain Mitty stood up
and strapped on his huge Webley-Vickers automatic. "It's forty kilometers
through hell, sir," said the sergeant. Mitty finished one last brandy.
"After all," he said softly, "what isn't?" The pounding of the cannon
increased; there was the rat-tat-tatting of machine guns, and from somewhere
came the menacing pocketa-pocketa-pocketa of the new flame-throwers. Walter
Mitty walked to the door of the dugout humming "Aupres de Ma Blonde." He
turned and waved to the sergeant. "Cheerio!" he said. . . .
Something struck his shoulder. "I've been looking all over this hotel for
you," said Mrs. Mitty. "Why do you have to hide in this old chair? How did
you expect me to find you?" "Things close in," said Walter Mitty vaguely.
"What?" Mrs. Mitty said. "Did you get the what's-its-name? The puppy
biscuit? What's in that box?" "Overshoes," said Mitty. "Couldn't you have
put them on in the store?" 'I was thinking," said Walter Mitty. "Does it
ever occur to you that I am sometimes thinking?" She looked at him. "I'm
going to take your temperature when I get you home," she said.
They went out through the revolving doors that made a faintly derisive
whistling sound when you pushed them. It was two blocks to the parking lot.
At the drugstore on the corner she said, "Wait here for me. I forgot
something. I won't be a minute." She was more than a minute. Walter Mitty
lighted a cigarette. It began to rain, rain with sleet in it. He stood up
against the wall of the drugstore, smoking. . . . He put his shoulders back
and his heels together. "To hell with the handkerchief," said Waker Mitty
scornfully. He took one last drag on his cigarette and snapped it away.
Then, with that faint, fleeting smile playing about his lips, he faced the
firing squad; erect and motionless, proud and disdainful, Walter Mitty the
Undefeated, inscrutable to the last.
1. First, read the definitions of parody below and then brainstorm five movie
or song parodies that you are familiar with.
Parody-
- An exaggerated imitation of a serious work for humorous
purposes. It borrows words or phrases from an original, and pokes fun at it.
This is also a form of allusion, since it is referencing a previous text,
event, etc. The Simpsons often do parodies of Shakespeare plays. Saturday
Night Live also does parodies of famous persons and events.
- A humorous imitation of
another, usually serious, work. It can take any fixed or open form, because
parodists imitate the tone, language, and shape of the original in order to
deflate the subject matter, making the original work seem absurd. Anthony
Hecht’s poem "Dover Bitch" is a famous parody of Matthew Arnold’s well-known
"Dover Beach." Parody may also be used as a form of literary criticism to
expose the defects in a work. But sometimes parody becomes an affectionate
acknowledgment that a well-known work has become both institutionalized in
our culture and fair game for some fun. For example, Peter De Vries’s "To
His Importunate Mistress" gently mocks Andrew Marvell’s "To His Coy
Mistress."
2. Create a three-column chart that describes what triggers Walter's
daydream, what occurs in the daydream (specifically address what role does Mitty
play), and finally describe what is being parodied in the third column.
Your chart might look like the one below:
| What triggers the daydream? |
What was the day dream about? |
What is being parodied? |
| Driving his wife to the beauty salon triggers
Walter's first daydream. |
He dreams of being a commanding naval pilot
heroically getting his bomber crew through a hurricane. |
war movies |
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3. What do you think causes Walter to drift into his daydreams and how does
this influence how he sees himself within these daydreams?
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